Category Archives: Work

burning doubt – lessons from a yoga mala

Posted on June 21, 2012 by Emily

At 5:30 this morning, I offered up all of my doubt to the forces of balance and harmony in the universe. Then, along with about 10 other women, I performed 108 sun salutations – a yoga mala to mark the … Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Life After Cancer, Philadelphia, Work, yoga | Tagged childcare, desperate housewife, doubt, Earl, instincts, NPR, sabbatical, stay-at-home mom, sun salutations, yoga mala | 5 Comments

no time to waste

Posted on May 27, 2012 by Emily

Four years ago, during a heatwave not unlike the one we are now experiencing, I lay confined in the partially air-conditioned recesses of our rented home in Northern Liberties, hanging on to the edges of the life with which four … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, Family, Life After Cancer, Philadelphia, Work | Tagged ambivalence, cancer's legacy, children, choices, happiness, heartbreak, heatwave, law, meaning, mother, working parents | 4 Comments

not yet

Posted on August 31, 2011 by Emily

I’ve reached the point where I have a stock reply when people ask if I have children: “Not yet.” It’s simple, straightforward and conveys my intention to be a parent. Most people who ask me don’t know about my cancer … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, fellow fighters, Infertility, Life After Cancer, Work | Tagged 50/50, adoption, belly, teaching moment, tumbleweeds | 2 Comments

flat as a pancake

Posted on April 2, 2011 by Emily

Hard truth: even after weathering a cancer diagnosis, treatment and recovery – after achieving the kind of semi-permanent euphoria that comes with embracing life after almost dying – it’s possible to find yourself drained, beat-down and discouraged. Nay, depressed. It’s … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, Baseball, Life After Cancer, Work | Tagged adoption, car seat, chemo, daffodils, existential angst, gardening, intestinal virus, invincible, Opening Day, pack and play, pancake, pansies, Phillies, professional life, PTSD, steam-roller, toilet-bowl, Work, yoga | 2 Comments

baby steps

Posted on December 15, 2010 by Emily

My inclination at the moment is to stack up today’s minor emotional setback against the nightmares that so many other fighters and survivors are enduring, and just let it go. It’s almost embarrassing to admit these feelings, but I … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, Infertility, Work | Tagged baby shower, booties, fumbling, menopausal, normalcy, oohing and aahing, parenthood, pregnant co-workers | 1 Comment

dreams, whiplash and pre-scope anxiety (oh my!)

Posted on October 7, 2010 by Emily

It is expected and logical that the eve of two surveillance scopes (lower and upper GI in a delicious one-two punch) would find me in a somewhat heightened state of anxiety. The psychological whiplash goes something like this: Spend an … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, Death, First Descents, Life After Cancer, medicine, running, Work | Tagged 10K, adoption seminar, anxiety, buzz-kill, colonoscopy, Dali, David Cronenberg, Denver Marathon, Dr. Chu, First Descents, going nuclear, HNPCC, NLDS, Nurse Sarah, Paul Thomas Anderson, recurrence, referrals, upper endoscopy | 1 Comment

chocolate shakes and ’80′s pop

Posted on July 16, 2010 by Emily

A wise person once said, “You don’t have to write a thousand words every time you sit down to do a post.” The same wise person has also said, “One of your great gifts as a writer is how direct … Continue reading →

Posted in Infertility, Life After Cancer, Work | Tagged adoption, child welfare, chocolate shake, Depeche Mode, humidity, injustice, pregnant co-workers, Talk Talk | 2 Comments

mister mean genes (or, expect the unexpected)

Posted on June 23, 2010 by Emily

Today I have had the surprising experience of someone else’s good news making me feel like shit. Are we in middle school again? I recall, quite starkly, a “profound thought” from my high school notes of the same name, which … Continue reading →

Posted in cancer, Life After Cancer, Work | Tagged biking, breast cancer, bungling criminals, cancer family, fate, genetic mutation, guilt, high school, jealousy, middle school, Moab, recurrence, running, unspoken truth | Leave a comment

love train

Posted on February 21, 2010 by Emily

Did my last post come across as, well, homicidal? I didn’t mean for it to. I’m peace-loving, really. To clarify, the only machine gun I would ever wield is one loaded with words; language is my best defense, my greatest … Continue reading →

Posted in First Descents, Life After Cancer, Philadelphia, Work | Tagged First Descents, funk music, gardening, homicidal, Iva, kayaking, love, machine gun, negativity, rock-climbing, Sudoku, Washington, whiplash, Woody Guthrie | Leave a comment

on the clock, out of my mind

Posted on February 17, 2010 by Emily

Another day, another installment of cosmic absurdity. A favorite expression of incredulity among some of my colleagues lately is to say, simply, with a little cock of the head, “REALLY?” That about sums up how I am feeling today. Tomorrow, … Continue reading →

Posted in Infertility, Life After Cancer, Work | Tagged baby shower, barren, child welfare, Larry Bowa, machine gun, pregnant co-workers | 1 Comment