Category Archives: Life After Cancer

dreams, whiplash and pre-scope anxiety (oh my!)

Posted on October 7, 2010 by Emily

It is expected and logical that the eve of two surveillance scopes (lower and upper GI in a delicious one-two punch) would find me in a somewhat heightened state of anxiety. The psychological whiplash goes something like this: Spend an … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, Death, First Descents, Life After Cancer, medicine, running, Work | Tagged 10K, adoption seminar, anxiety, buzz-kill, colonoscopy, Dali, David Cronenberg, Denver Marathon, Dr. Chu, First Descents, going nuclear, HNPCC, NLDS, Nurse Sarah, Paul Thomas Anderson, recurrence, referrals, upper endoscopy | 1 Comment

actually, it kind of IS about the bike

Posted on September 30, 2010 by Emily

Last weekend marked a huge milestone in my journey away from cancer and back to life. It crept up on me, rather unexpectedly, and left me filled with a lighter-than-air sense of triumph. After cycling seventy-five miles from the outskirts … Continue reading →

Posted in cycling, Life After Cancer, Philadelphia, running | Tagged 9/11, causeways, cycling, Johnson's Popcorn, Mack and Manco's, MLK Drive, MS 150 CIty to Shore, neuropathy, Ocean City, Phillies, pierogies, Planet Cancer, port-a-potties, rock-climbing, stage III ovarian cancer, Team Anti-Corp, Turkey Hill ice cream, Utah, Wyoming | 1 Comment

atonement

Posted on September 18, 2010 by Emily

Thirteen years into my partnership/marriage with Mike, and there’s still an inescapable awkwardness that creeps in each year around the High Holidays. While I recognize the significance of this period on the calendar from a theoretical standpoint, some of its … Continue reading →

Posted in Family, Life After Cancer, Writing | Tagged atoning, bagels, bike shop, compassion, cruelty, Denver Marathon, fortitude, iTunes, Judaism, Kate, Mike, MS 150, patience, pumping up, smoked fish, synagogue, therapist, understanding, Yom Kippur | 3 Comments

comfort in the fight

Posted on September 12, 2010 by Emily

There’s danger in complacency/And comfort in the fight. – Jonatha Brooke Every so often, no matter how “great” you are feeling, there are moments in a survivor’s life when the sheer shit storm of cancer and its after-effects come along … Continue reading →

Posted in Family, fellow fighters, Life After Cancer | Tagged 9/11, comfort, compassion, devotion, fight, First Descents, friends, Hottie Bucks, Jonatha Brooke, old wounds, over-looked truths, posse, priceless, sister, Sourland Mountain Preserve, vigil | Leave a comment

equilibrium restored, or brief notes on being a survivor

Posted on September 8, 2010 by Emily

This just in: sometimes, life after cancer completely sucks. I try not to spend a whole lot of time here feeling sorry for myself, or bitching about how hard my life has been since my diagnosis. The truth is, most … Continue reading →

Posted in fellow fighters, Life After Cancer, running | Tagged blackness, children, connection, crying, Facebook, fellow warriors, genetic mutation, GI scopes, husbands, illusory, iPods, isolation, running, shit storm, suffering, support, survivorship | 3 Comments

my left foot (or, what’s compulsive after cancer?)

Posted on September 6, 2010 by Emily

Today started with barking, dog wrestling and a power outage. We just spent ten days taking care of our friends’ Pomapoo, who loved to begin each day with a vigorous yet playful attack on our own aging basset hound. High-pitched … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, cycling, Death, fellow fighters, Life After Cancer, running | Tagged adoption, basset hound, buzzing, coffee with chicory, compulsive, cycling, genetic mutation, life expectancy, MS 150 CIty to Shore, mums, neuropathy, Pomapoo, power outage, prognosis, PSE&G, running, Sarah Sadtler Feather, weed whacking | 4 Comments

the invisible hand of first descents

Posted on August 29, 2010 by Emily

Some things are so obvious, we risk taking them for granted. Some things underpin so much of who we are, what we do, that it seems unnecessary, or redundant, to spend time reflecting on their significance. At the end of … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, cycling, First Descents, Life After Cancer, running | Tagged adoption, Caesar, challenge, cycling, evolution, First Descents, Jackson, journey back to life, Moab, oxygen, resilience, Rock 'n' Roll marathon, rock-climbing, running, Stiletto, strength, three-part harmony, training | 1 Comment

heroes: roll-call

Posted on August 22, 2010 by Emily

In my own stillness today, it seems right to offer a round-up of a few of the fiercest fighters around me. I often think about this ad-hoc community of young adult survivors that I am so blessed to be a … Continue reading →

Posted in fellow fighters, First Descents, Life After Cancer, Photography | Tagged ALL, blogs, Caring Bridge, determination, Facebook, Fridge, Giggles, grace, heroes, Holly, Imerman Angels, Jennie, marathon, Ovarian Cancer Research Foundation, positivity, triathlon | Leave a comment

enjoy the silence

Posted on August 22, 2010 by Emily

It is an admittedly irrational fear of mine that if I rest for too long, or indulge in too much stillness, cancer will somehow have won. Ridiculous, I know. I am three months shy of the third anniversary of my … Continue reading →

Posted in cycling, First Descents, Life After Cancer, running | Tagged bliss, contentment, cycling, First Descents blog, fuel, humidity, irrational fear, joy, laundry, rest, running, silence, sloth, stillness | Leave a comment

the readiness is all

Posted on August 8, 2010 by Emily

Desperate to resume “living” as quickly as possible after finishing chemotherapy in June of 2008, I returned to work – part-time, and in a limited capacity, but returned nonetheless – just three short weeks after my last treatment. In hindsight, … Continue reading →

Posted in adoption, Family, Infertility, Life After Cancer | Tagged adoption, anxiety, cycling, determined, medical history, neuropathy, obstacles, readiness, rehabilitation, rock-climbing, running, sweat, tears, undetered, vertigo, Work | 5 Comments